Thoughts on Good Online Teaching

It's been a priviledge to be a guinea pig for pioneering large-scale online learning. From completely online classes, to blended in-person classes, to online Church, I've been able to experience the good, the bad, and the ugly of online learning. Here's a few tips for any professor, Sunday School teacher, businessman, or elementary educator looking to spruce up their online teaching skills. 

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Bungee Jumping aka Teaching

 I've decided that teaching is lot like bungee jumping.

As this semester is winding to a close, it's been great to look back and see all that I've accomplished so far. I've explored classroom managament theorists from B.F. Skinner to Alfie Khon to everywhere in between. I've created high-quality, peer-reviewed asseesment questions for diverse standards and adjusted them to make them more equitable and accessible to English Language Learners. I've learned about school governance, educational policy, and the nitty-gritty stuff of being a teacher. I've spent hours crash-coursing everything special education, from IEPs, FAPE, IDEA, and several other acryonyms.  

Now, just a month or two away from my first practicum, I feel as if I am about to go bungee-jumping off into a deep abyss.

Photo by Erwan Hesry on Unsplash

Part of me knows that bungee jumping is a safe endevour. All the training I've done the past 2 1/2 years will act as a safety cord to prevent my certain demise. Master teachers, professors, and peers will be their watching to ensure that I don't fail. But I'm still the one who has to make the jump, alone, into the deep dark abyss where all my teacher idealism, passion, and planning meets the real world. And it's terrifying. 

What if my bungee cord snaps? What if a decade and a half of experieince in the public school system has not adequately for what school is like now, in a *hopefully* post-pandemic world? What if my management plan is a flop, what if all my progressive teaching techniques get thrown out the window and I end up using jolly ranchers as open bribery to keep children on task for 3 minutes chunks of time?

It could happen. Probably won't, but it could.

What I've begun to realize, however, is that feeling of complete, incomprehensible, terrifying uncertainity- that feeling of teetering on the cusp of either greatness or failure- is a feeling that most teachers, or, at least, the BEST teachers, experience daily. 

The best teachers are incredibly confident, but they never assume competence. The best teachers know they are well educated, but they also know they are not experts. The best teachers know what works well in their classroom, but they aren't afraid to try something new. In short, the best teachers aren't teachers at all: they are really students, eternal students who are wholeheartedly and completely committed to the excrutiating process of learning something new every day.

You can see examples of this learning process across the globe. It's manifest in the way that teachers in 2020 have spent hours researching edtech tools and online best practices. It's the reason why 30-year experienced teachers still attend professional development conferences with gusto every year. It's why educators download duolingo to attempt to learn a few words of Arabic for the new student in their classroom. Examples of these kinds of teachers are everywhere.

So, in this, my first attempt to bungee jump to... success? failure? the best job ever? I remember that I stand with some of the best educators of the world in my leap. Educators who, to the astonishment of their friends and family, find joy in the exhilirating, terrifying, fast-paced, demanding, sometimes even dangerous, job of teaching. Educators who assume the aura of expertise, yet work with the humility and energy of a novice. Educators who make a difference in the lives of their students

I can't wait to make the leap. 

Top 5 COVID-Approved Wedding Ideas

'Tis the season for engagements. It seems like all my friends are either in serious relationships, are engaged, or just got married. It's been so fun to be able to watch them find joy in their new stages of life.
It is definitely, however, a weird time to get hitched. Nothing like a pandemic to spruce up the wedding drama! I would definitely know. I had my own COVID wedding a few weeks ago, and it was amazing! ...but definitely not the wedding I had always dreamed would happen!
I thought I'd share a few tips for all those beautiful brides out there who are navigating these crazy times!

Tip #1: Host a drive-by or virtual wedding activity. 
This is a great way for friends and family to be able to meet the groom and bride-to-be without anyone getting put at risk. The bride, for example could host a drive-by bridal shower, where people drive by her house at a certain time to say hello and leave a gift. Or, the bride and groom can host a meet-n'-greet video call for their family and friends,where they can share the story of how they first met, what their first date was, and how the proposal went. I will be posting more ideas about virtual wedding adaptations in the future, so stay tuned!

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       Photo by Chris Montgomery from Unsplash 7/16

Tip #2: Create New Wedding Traditions
Months before my wedding, things were starting to look pretty grim for me and my then fiancee. We weren't sure if we were going to be able to have anyone besides our parents present for our small civil ceremony, and we were having to cancel previous wedding plans left and right. To help myself combat all the melancholy, I decided to focus on creating new wedding traditions instead of dwelling on the traditions that I could no longer have. One of those traditions that I chose to participate in was the FIRST LOOK.
Now, the First Look isn't a new concept, but it was a new concept for me. Basically, a First Look involves a dramatic reveal of the bride's wedding gown and the groom's suit or tux. Usually, a cute photo sesh follows that captures both the bride and groom's reactions to each other as well as their excitement for the coming marriage. Previously, I had always wanted my actual wedding to be the moment that my fiancee would first see my dress, but I soon fell in love with the first look idea. It gave me something to look forward to, and it's a great COVID safe tradition since it only needs to involve the bride, groom, and photographer.

Tip #3: Adapt Old Wedding Traditions
Instead of having a traditional huge wedding reception, my family opted to have a small intimate dinner at a nice restaurant. We were able to adapt many of our favorite wedding traditions to this new setting, and this helped our family dinner have a traditional reception feel to it. We had little gift bags with bride and groom trivia, as well as blocks for people to give us date and meal ideas.
The crowning moment of the night was the daddy-daughter dance and the subsequent first dance with my man. It was so, so special, made even more so because I didn't have to feel embarrassed or self-conscious about dancing in front of a million people. I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Tip #4: Discard Wedding Traditions You Dislike
I ate a ton the day of my wedding. Yup. It was great.
Most people complain about how on their wedding day, they don't get a chance to eat all the wonderful food that's available to them because they're busy greeting all the guests. Luckily, I didn't have to worry about that! My husband and I were able to sit down and have a nice, relaxing, delicious meal. I even had time to breakfast AND lunch too!


Photo by Tony Eight Media from Unsplash 7/16

Tip #5: Spend Time Together
Usually, the weeks leading up to a wedding can be intensely stressful because of everything that is going on. Although having a COVID safe wedding doesn't make all marriage-related stress disappear, it's nice to have such a special time in your life simplified! As a couple, we decided to do a fun countdown to the wedding. We took turns thinking up of little ideas for how we could celebrate every day we had together, including the excruciatingly slow days leading up to the wedding.
For day 6 before the wedding, I found 6 pennies and told my fiancee, "A sixth sense tells me that I should marry you."
Thought I was pretty clever with that one! ;)

Whatever is is that you choose to do, a few simple tweaks to your weddings will help ensure that this important time in your life is a special, safe, and happy experience for everyone!

Motherhood and Me

I'm sure my mother had no idea what she was getting into when she had me. No. IDEA.

I was so terribly inadequate at dressing myself that she had to create a booklet for me to describe what not to wear. She gave all my clothes a number and told me which clothes matched and why. Even as a fourth grader, I could not understand why my multicolored, polka-dot flowered skirt did not match my different multicolored, also floral shirt. Shouldn't all flowers match?

My mom also must have been the original Uber Eats driver. I don't know how many times she had to drop my lunch off at school because I forgot it. Or how many times she had to drive back to school because I left my essay on the printer, or I forgot my Showtime uniform on her bed, or I needed ten bucks to pay for a club activity. Despite all of my mother's expert Uber driving service, I'm sure she never got appreciated enough. She definitely didn't get paid anything to help cover the hundreds of dollars she spent re-buying us all jackets in elementary school every month because heaven knows we couldn't keep track of them for more than a week.

By the time I got old enough to actually be of assistance to my mom and help babysit her four other kids, I proved myself quite... inept at the job. My first time babysitting, someone got a poopy diaper that was so bad I couldn't ignore it, but we didn't have any diapers, and I didn't even know HOW to change a diaper, so I tried to make one out of paper towels, and I asked my brother Caleb to help me out my throwing the dirty paper towels I had already used in the trash. But Caleb thought that flushing them down the toilet was an even better idea, so the toilet overflowed, and we had to run and get my parents from the very important Church meeting they were in the middle of having. Imagine my parents' surprise when Caleb, with urgency and panic, ran through the chapel, pleaded with them for help, and promised that it really was an emergency. I'm sure when they opened the door and saw one child running around naked (pro tip: making diapers out of paper towels is really, really hard), two other kids making a mess of the toys in the corner, and me, on my hands and knees, of course wearing something that didn't match, trying to use paper towels to mop up the toilet water that was quickly soaking into the carpet, they wondered if I could ever be trusted to babysit again.

(Side note: they did trust me to babysit again. Whether that was out of actual trust in my capabilities or sheer desperation, I'm not sure. I will say, however, that after my first fiasco, I did give provide them with some high-quality babysitting service. I would stand over the cribs of the twins and use the techniques I had learned from my Nancy Drew books to ensure that they were still breathing every five minutes. Now THAT's dedication.)

Then there was all the times that I would spring things on my mom at the last minute. Hey, my friends are coming over. Okay, when? Right. NOW. And you will need to feed them lunch. The California mission project is due. Tomorrow. I have to pay club dues for the seven clubs I am in. By Friday. I also signed you up to bring cupcakes to my class party, and of course we don't have any cupcakes in the house, and Costco is already closed, so now you're going to be up late making cupcakes, and will have to try to find a recipe online that doesn't require eggs to make cupcakes because of course, we are all out of eggs.

And then, worst of all, I had to go on and grow up on her. Graduation. College. Mission. MARRIAGE (don't know if she's all the way ready for that one yet, haha!). And suddenly, she couldn't come and bring me lunch when I was hungry and tired and sick. She couldn't drag me to the doctors by my ears for my own good. She couldn't hug me when I cried, or mop up all my dirty messes, or threaten to beat up anyone who messes with me, or break out her secret stash of chocolate to make all my problems go away. She could be there for me in many ways, but she couldn't BE there, at least not physically.

And yet, despite the distance, she has helped me in more ways than I know. She has raised me to be interdependent, to trust in God and His plan. To reach out for help when I need. To give my best, and let my best be good enough, even if it sometimes includes a dirty room or a messy life or a C- on a midterm. From birth onward, she has taught me and loved me and saved me in ways that only a mother can. As a baby, she put up a picture of Jesus in the hallway and repeated His name so many times that "Jesus" was literally my first word. In a similar manner, she has spent her whole life raising me to have Christ's name not just on my lips, but in my heart.

Now, on the brink of marriage, motherhood is slowly ceasing to seem like an elusive concept that I might someday maybe experience. It is quickly becoming part of the identity that makes up who I am now. It is about women's unbreakable strength and unforeseen potential. It is about service and sacrifice laughter and love. And most of all, it is about guiding all of God's children to hope, happiness, and peace.

Happy Mother's Day to all women everywhere, but especially to my mom, who is about as good as they come. Love you!

The Master Physician

I feel like this blog post merits a Tangled quote. Anyone who is at half the Tangled fan I am will know that the movie starts off with the story of Flynn Ryder saying, "This is the story of how I died. But don't worry! It's a happy story!"
Basically a perfect description of my life right now.

Saturday, April 11th. The day that certainly felt like death. I had my first anxiety attack. For those of you who have never experienced one, count yourself lucky. For those of you who frequently experience them, my heart is full of empathy and love and admiration at your continued strength. Basically, when you have a panic attack, your body freaks out. You feel like you can't breathe because you're hyperventilating so bad. You're anxious and fearful and feel as if you are dying. Your mind actually believes this. Then tingling starts, in your face, and lips, then radiates down your arms, and then down to your legs, until it feels as if your whole body is tingling. So of course you think you're having a heart attack. Then your hands start curling up, immovable, frozen, as your panic reaches epic proportions as you try and mentally figure out what is happening to you.

I had never had one before, and I'm also kind of a hypochondriac, so of course I assumed I was actually dying. Sounds kind of funny now, but really wasn't when I was experiencing it. I woke my poor wonderful fiancee up and was basically like... hey... I feel like I'm dying... can you come over? He was there almost instantly. I made him call 9-1-1 and was trying to get my hands to move enough to access some emergency contact information on my phone. My cute man was still on the line with the paramedics when he began motioning for me to get up. "They want you to meet them downstairs".

There I was, my whole body trembling and frozen, my mind contemplating real impending doom. And the paramedics were telling me to get up. What?!
I truly thought I couldn't do it. I thought I was going to pass out or fall over or, I don't know, fall down the stairs. But my dear Kendall helped lift me up and walk me down the stairs, one at a time, always by my side, until we reached the medics.

They were calm and collected and kind and told me that I was not dying, that my vitals were fine, that I was having an anxiety attack, and that I should go for a walk and watch a good show on Disney+ or something. They gave me the words I needed to hear.

With this Easter season, I have contemplated again and again this experience and what it has taught me about Jesus Christ. I think so often, we're presumably nearly dead, and we wait for some angelic sent help to save us from all of our problems. And usually, that doesn't happen. The angelic help comes, surrounds us, sustains us, but it doesn't remove us from our sufferings, and that sometimes makes us feel like that heavenly help doesn't exist. But it really does. Sometimes it's just a matter of getting up and taking one step at a time until we reach the relief that we so desperately need.

With all that has been happening this season, I have really liked thinking of Jesus Christ as a most Perfect Physician. He can heal any wound, disease, or infirmity, and through the resurrection, He has allowed all of us to overcome even death itself. No mortal being, expert or otherwise, could ever claim to have that kind of power. More than that, however, He knows us perfectly. He knows how to push us just enough that we grow but not so much that it's too much. He prescribes the perfect medication and gives the perfect advice, which we often refuse to follow, and then we wonder why our problems exists. And unlike the typical physician, He is always there. He's the One who picks up the 9-1-1 call, the one who rushes to succor us, the One who asks us to take just a few more steps to access His power, the One who is also at our side to help us take those few extra steps to Him. Nowhere else can we find the complete healing that He offers.

My heart is full of gratitude for all the amazing heroes here on Earth who are giving of themselves during this time of great need, and most of all, to my Savior Jesus Christ, who is always, always there.

Didn't I tell you it was going to be a happy story?

Photos by Lina Trochez and Marcus Spiske from Unsplash

How to Date your Significant Other During COVID-19

Got the quarantine blues? 

The solution's just an arm's reach away. Here's my 14 ways to do it for 14 days!

1.) Make breakfast for dinner: We're talking pulling out all the stops. Chocolate chip banana pancakes with all the fixin's you can scavenge for in your cupboards.

2.) Bob Ross Paint Night: Art isn't just beautiful, fun, and happy: it can be stress relieving and relaxing. Find stuff at home that you could transfer your creative energy towards. You could paint a mural in the background, do adult coloring books, make a water color painting, or do any number of things. Or, get some chalk and write positive messages on the sidewalks in front of your house for passing pedestrians

3.) Get dinner delivered from your favorite small business: Support your favorite small business by putting in an order during this difficult time

4.) Host a 2 person game night: There's tons of great options to choose from. We did Speed, and I am unashamed to admit that I was the reigning champion.

5.) #Throwback Thursday: Pull out all those old, cringy pictures from high school and do some good reminiscing. If anything, the pictures will provide some much needed laughter. Bonus points if you've got embarrassing videos to share too!!!!!

6.) Create a scrapbook together: Did you ever end up finishing that photo book you were making for your last family trip? Have an anniversary or other milestone coming up? This is a great time to actually get those photo books done and spend some quality time together reminiscing about all the good times.

7.) Have a group date night through a video call: Reconnect with friends through a virtual group date. A great thing to do for such an event is play some verbal, how-well-do-you-know-each-other games. If you don't have any ideas, just google games for wedding receptions or bridal showers, which usually have funny prompts and ideas.

8.) Have a cooking competition: Are you breaking out some of your old food storage? Make it a competition to see who can actually make something edible with what's available.

9.) Have a jam session: Does one of you play an instrument? It's a great time to brush up on skills and maybe even teach each other how to play. Or, if you are not musically inclined, make a brand new playlist together that you think describes your relationship.

10.) Send some snail mail: Ah, yes, good ol' snail mail. Write up some notes for people who might need a little pick-me-up during this time.

11.) Document history: This is a crazy time that we're living in right now. Make a time capsule to remember everything that's been happening. (you can make a virtual time capsule too!) You might include crazy anecdotal stories, news articles, or even some of your favorite memes. Or an empty tube of toilet paper...

12.) Talk: What a concept. With all the family time we have, this is a great time to have time dedicated to good conversations. If you're stuck, try googling weird conversation starters. We had a lively discussion about the relative ranking of Disney sequels and the quality of Disney live action films. Quite entertaining.

13.) Have a movie night: This seems to be what everyone's doing, but you can make it fun by choosing a new one that has just been released or choosing a throwback movie that you both loved. I give Marvel's Black Panther and Disney's Emperor's New Groove both a 10/10

14.) Decorate the house: I actually did this with my roommate, but it's a great date night idea too! We had a huge empty wall in our apartment, and we have started to fill it with different colored sticky notes saying things we're grateful for. The list grows every day.

That's it folks! Stay tuned for more ideas of how to take full advantage of this very strange, very unique time.

Funny Things Keep Happening

The other day my fiance and I went and did curb-side pick-up at Olive Garden. It was so funny because as we were driving to the curb, we watched another couple walk up to the doors of Olive Garden. The manager was waiting with a smile and said, "Thank you for joining us during the apocalypse, welcome to Olive Garden!" We got a good laugh out of that. 

The other funny thing that has been happening with all the stuff that's been going on is that a lot of people have taken up walking and running these past few weeks. The Provo running trail has been pretty crowded (relatively speaking, with socially distancing intact).  I didn't see any of these people running with me when it was 19 degree outside a month ago!

The funniest thing, though, is there's this older gentleman who I often see on my runs. Basically every time I see him, he's leisurely walking down the road, but every time he catches sight of me running, he also starts running! And this guy can run pretty fast. But it seems he only runs when he sees me running. I don't know if I'm his inspiration or his competition, but it definitely cracks me up. 

Anyways, with all the crazy stuff that's been going on, I feel like most everyone has been trying to cope with things in the ways that they can, whether that be through humor, distraction, appropriate social connection, or physical exercise. One thing that's given me comfort the past few days is the scriptures. I found this cool verse in the Book of Mormon though that was pretty relevant to the current events happening right now. To give a little context, this scripture is about a prophet, Jacob, and how he responds to someone who challenged his faith in Christ and Christ's sacrifice (aka the atonement): 

Jacob 7: 12 

And this is not all—it has been made manifest unto me, for I have heard and seen; and it also has been made manifest unto me by the ^apower of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, I know if there should be no atonement made all mankind must be ^blost.

What hit me when I was reading this verse was that because of Jesus Christ, the world is not lost. As dismal as things seem to be right now, there is always hope in Christ. He paid the price for our sins so that we may live again. That's pretty cool! The world may become dangerous, the world may become unpredictable, but the world will never become lost. We can trust in that.

Thanks for reading! I wish you all the best of luck in staying safe, happy, and sane!  

Why it's NOT the end of the World and Also my Wedding Dress

On my last day working with on campus food service before everything started shutting down, I greeted everyone with a smile and jokingly asked them how the end of the world was treating them. (It took all of my self-control to not be like, "Good morning, welcome to the end of the world, how may I help you? Would you like a breakfast panini?") Since at the time I was working in the engineering building, most of the students responded to me with, "It's going good. Still got to finish my group project". I guess even a worldwide pandemic does not stop engineers from getting their homework done!

In all seriousness, though, it's been a crazy couple weeks for pretty much everyone. This week, I've been receiving emails basically every couple hours that have drastically changed what my life will look like for the next couple weeks. I've been slightly obsessively checking my email for class and school updates, work updates, and church updates. It's been a real adventure.

Despite all the craziness, though, lots of good stuff has been happening. I love this video by President Nelson that really explains to us why we can still have hope:

What I love most about this video is President Nelson saying "We're living in a remarkable age where we constantly see the hand of the Lord in the lives of His children." What a beautiful statement! When times get rough, it's hard to see the good in anything. Irrational fear encroaches on every other feeling. It can be really, really hard. But God has been blessing us individually, as a Church, and as a world in so many ways.

I've got to share one super cool way I've seen God's hand in my life. Friday was a designated girl's night. My roommate Paige and I were basically like, alright, we're bored and done being cooped up in the house. Let's go to DI (our favorite local thrift shop). I decided to try on wedding dresses just for fun. I didn't actually plan on getting one, but thought it would be a super fun, stress-releasing experience.

Pro tip: for anyone getting married, GO DRESS SHOPPING AT DI FIRST!! There were so many pretty dresses there and like three dresses I could have potentially bought for my wedding. The first one I tried on was super cute, the second one too, but the third one was what really took my breath away. I literally cried when I put it on, it was so pretty. I felt like a princess. I bought it right then and there. It was so cute because all the ladies who were working at DI got in on the action. They were making comments on the different wedding dresses and giving tips as to how I could alter them. One lady came up to us and asked if the dress was for a temple wedding. When I said yes, she gave me a Lifesaver. I seriously love DI!


Photo by Cherisse Kenion on Unsplash 

Anyways, me and Paige finished off our girl's night listening to Ben Rector and Ed Sheeran songs and watching part of the first episode of Disney Fair Tale Wedding. About as perfect of a girl's night as it can get.

So yeah, maybe it feels like the world's ending. I'm unemployed. Wedding plans are a mess. The economy's a mess. Our honeymoon plans are a mess. My room is a mess (although that's not a novel thing, it's always a mess). Through it all, though, I can have hope. I can be grateful for beautiful tender mercies like finding my dream wedding dress at a thrift shop or having super cute Ben Rector music to listen to. And I can thank God for my wonderful family, wonderful friends, and the wonderful man with whom I will someday soon share eternity with.

The future is going to be ridiculously amazing!

Time Travel and Fog

So yesterday, I went to the temple kind of early. Early, meaning college student early, since I woke up at like 7. Anyways, the walk there was a bit chilly since these past few days have been extremely foggy. When I got to the temple, this was the view that awaited me. 

For those of you who have never been to the Provo temple, this sign sits at the front of the temple grounds, less than a football field's distance away from the actual temple. But since the fog was so dense, it was impossible to see the temple even from so close. 

Now. Travel back in time with me...

It is April 5th, 1829. You're a good friend of Joseph Smith, and you're there when this random schoolteacher, Oliver Cowdery, shows up on Joseph's doorstep, shares his story about how he came to know the Smith family, and states his interest in Joseph's work. Two days later, this random man is already acting as a scribe for Joseph in the work of translating the Book of Mormon. 

Wait, what? 

The part that really got me about this story was the TWO DAYS part. Oliver went from never having met the prophet to being his scribe for one of the most important works of the Restoration. I can't imagine how Joseph and Oliver must have felt about the situation. I'm not sure if Joseph would have felt surprised by it all, as I'm sure he was used to God providing miracles in moments of absolute need, but I'm sure he felt incredibly grateful that God had provided help for him. But I really wonder how Oliver felt. He couldn't have possibly guessed how involved he would be in the work of the restoration. Yet, even after only two days, he seemed to have sensed that there was something different about Joseph and something special about the work he was to do. Oliver was ready and willing to do the Lord's will, even after just two days. 

Alright. Back to 2020 people. 

It might seem a little crazy that Oliver was called to serve so quickly, but the reality is, life often happens that way. Like Oliver, we need to not only be ready, but worthy, prepared, and willing to accept the will of the Lord. We can't be complacent about our preparation. We can't metaphorically walk onto the temple grounds, walk past the temple sign, and keep right on walking towards the temple, then act surprised when it appears out of nowhere from the fog. What? The temple? I was not expecting that! It doesn't work that way. 

So what can we do to be prepared? 

That's for each of us to figure out. What I will say, however, is that I'm sure whatever the challenges that appear, we will not be alone. 

Have a great day everyone! 

See Joseph Smith-History 1:66-67 to learn more. It's linked above. 

Photo creds: Me:) 

Ginseng root and the Gospel

In one of my classes, I discovered something super cool that I didn't know about Joseph Smith's family. I got my info off of the Church's website, and you can read more about it here

"Around 1802, Joseph Sr. invested in ginseng root, a promising commodity, but a partner stole the returns, leaving the Smith family virtually bankrupt. Joseph Sr. sold his farm and paid down other debts with Lucy’s dowry. After continuing to struggle as a farmer in Vermont and New Hampshire, he finally moved his family to Palmyra, New York, purchasing a farm in nearby Manchester in 1818."

This is ginseng root. Google tried to tell me that it can prevent everything from stress to fatigue to old to cancer. Pretty cool.

Anyways. Basically Joseph Smith Sr. and Lucy Mack Smith had actually been pretty well off financially in the beginning of their marriage. They had the support and love of their financially stable parents, which helped them get settled. Then, due to some unlucky circumstances, they got ripped off by greedy men engaging in shady business practices and became dirt poor. 

I can't imagine how frustrating that would have been for Joseph and Lucy. Like, really? I think suddenly becoming super poor would be a majorly depressing life event for anyone, but especially for two people who came from somewhat stable economic backgrounds, and who would someday raise a family of 11 children. What a bummer.

Imagine, however, the effects that such an economic background would have had on the young Joseph Smith Jr. Such "indigent circumstances", as Joseph called them, would have shaped who he became. Think of all the time a 19th century farm boy would have had to meditate. I don't know much about farming, but I know that it's hard work. It's physically demanding, time-consuming, constant work. Joseph would have had hours every day to think and imagine and dream as he plowed and pulled and pruned. 

We 21st century people have a hard time imagining living such a life. In our fast-paced, ever evolving world, we're lucky if we get ten minutes to meditate every day. Phones, Facebook, friends, even freeway accidents: they all riot for our attention and distract us from what matters most. What would we gain if we, like Joseph, could take time for "serious reflection" and meditation (JS-H 1:8)? We might discover that the heavens will open for us just as they did for a young boy with careful questions and constant faith. 

Joseph and Emma

Hello friends! In preparation for the 200th anniversary of the First Vision, I present some personal musings on the significance of this sacred event.
While reading Joseph Smith-History this week, I thought Of a couple things that I had never considered. First off, Joseph married Emma before he got the plates. They were married about eight months before he obtained the plates. I’d like to think that those eight months put him through a refiner’s fire that helped spiritually prepare him to protect and defend the Book of Mormon. More than that, however, I think about how Emma was present for basically every early event of the restoration minus the First Vision. She was an active participant in the restoration of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I don’t think that’s a coincidence. I believe that Joseph was never meant to engage in such a sacred work alone and that Emma was the perfect companion for him, both in the context of his personal life as well as in the context of his spiritual journey as a prophet called of God.
I wrote this poem reflecting on what Emma had to give up to marry Joseph, but also what she gained. She lost friends, home, family; she lost children, she lived without riches, without fanfare, and without worldly adoration; and she eventually lost even her dear Joseph. But she was privilege to play an important role in the restoration of the gospel, and I’m sure the happiness that that brought her as well as the joy she found in her family outweighed any cost.

Married Life

She stands at the window, waits for him
To ride in from the town
And smiles when she spots his horse afar
Making its way down
She rushes to prepare for him
A hot drink to warm him up
On tiptoes, reaching for some bread
Cheese and soup for him to sup.
The door creaks open, flurries fly
She hears the blizzard’s haunting howls
Joseph’s snowy, head to toe
But his face is free of scowls
She smiles, her dear Joseph never
Seems to have dark days
Even when the the storms are fierce
He reflects the sun’s warm rays
He sits down, talks of the town
She moves to prepare for him his bread
He pauses, reaching for her hand
Preferring she stay with him instead
He is startled when he sees her face
It’s quiet pain that looks back at him
Her eyes, vulnerable and scared
Have tears falling from red rims
He knows without words why she cries
And his heart aches to heal her pain
Family, friends, and home sacrificed
So her dear Joseph she could gain
He sweeps her up and holds her close
Wonders what is left for him to do
He marvels at the price she has paid
To defend what she knows is true
He holds her as her shoulders still
She gently pulls away
She looks at him with such determination in her eyes
He knows she’s here to stay